Insider's Guide To The Male Vocabulary

"Haven't I seen you before?" = "Nice ass."

"I'm a Romantic." = "I'm poor."

"I need you" = "My hand is tired."

"I am different from all the other guys" = "I am not circumcised."

"I want a commitment." = "I'm sick of masturbation."

"You're the only girl I've ever cared about" = "You are the only girl who hasn't rejected me."

"I really want to get to know you better." = "So I can tell my friends about it."

"It's just orange juice, try it." = "3 more shots, and she'll have her legs around my head."

"She's kinda cute." = "I want to have sex with her till I am blue."

"I don't know if I like her" = "She won't sleep with me."

"I miss you so much" = "I am so horny that my male-roommate is starting to look
good."

"Was it good for you?" = "I'm insecure about my manhood."

"How do I compare with all your other boyfriends?" = "Is my penis really that small?"

"I had a wonderful time last night." = "Who the hell are you?"

"Do you love me?" = "I've done something stupid and you might find out."

"Do you 'really' love me?" = "I've done something stupid and you're going to find out sooner or later."

"How much do you love me?" = "I've done something really stupid and someone's on their way to tell you by now."

"I have something to tell you." = "Get tested."

"I'll give you a call." = "I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again."

"I've been thinking a lot." = "You're not as attractive as when I was drunk."

"I think we should just be friends." = "You're ugly."

"I've learned a lot from you." = "Next!!!!"

Very funny.

But to be honest, I don't recognize any of those points.

They don't ring true.

most i don't recognize from dustin but i guess some of them i could agree with to some degree!

But that is really the point, you ain't supposd to notice, otherwise we'd be in trouble!

"Blah, yadda, blah-blah, yadda, etcetera, blah, blah, etcetera,
yadda [bollocks], yadda, blah-blah, yadda, etcetera, blah, blah." = "Words, oh beautiful words."

-Maxim

netniV spouted:
But that is really the point, you ain't supposd to notice, otherwise we'd be in trouble!

Absolutely right.

And if a guy had posted stuff like this? Some other guys would have to kill him.

Fortunately, this will pass off as a joke and the day after tomorrow no woman will be the wiser...

;)

PS I also have to admire MAXIM's new found economy with words and lines!

blueeyes spouted:
Insider's Guide To The Male Vocabulary

"I've been thinking a lot." = "You're not as attractive as when I was drunk."


To my eternal shame I have actually said this.

I'm sorry.

WBPS, you are not suppose to ADMIT this freewillingly. You are a disgrace to the male population.

Maxim, i think i've heard that line before. It usually comes after a long night of drinking, but I always thought it meant.. i'm drunk and so are you so lets screw!

NetniV, of course you wouldn't want a woman to know what you really mean when you say "i've been thinking" cuz then she would come off with one of her "FINE" comments and then give you a "LOUD SIGH" or something to that extent.

jessika24 spouted:
WBPS, you are not suppose to ADMIT this freewillingly. You are a disgrace to the male population.


I said I'm sorry!

I got a LOUD SIGH in response.

yeah you most definately got a loud sigh for that one!

he he loved it. Nearly all sounds or rings true. ;)

jessika24 spouted:
yeah you most definately got a loud sigh for that one!

:D

awh, lil allie's loving this adult conversation!

allie h spouted:
awh, lil allie's loving this adult conversation!

Cover your ears, child! If you stay here any longer, you will be corrupted...













... too late!

cmontgom spouted:


Absolutely right.

And if a guy had posted stuff like this? Some other guys would have to kill him.

Fortunately, this will pass off as a joke and the day after tomorrow no woman will be the wiser...

;)

PS I also have to admire MAXIM's new found economy with words and lines!


Ah but the great part about this is that i'm a FEMALE that posted it....and therefore even worse that we are aware of this!!!! And also if it does become forgotten to all of us ladies....i kept a copy of the e-mail this came in so i have it for future reference in case anyone needs it!!!! ;)

Yes, it would be terrible if it weren't a grossly distorted caricature of relationships between men and women. It's probably funny if you don't have the imagination to see how pathetic it is.

Ah but the great part about this is that i'm a FEMALE that posted it....

That's the great part? You're not Sue Townsend by any chance?

Posy Simmonds is more likely?

Oh lighten up....it was meant to be funny and taken as a joke...BTW...who is Sue Townsend and Posy Simmonds never heard of them before????