I know that the term Consumers basicaly encompasses us all, however there are certina consumers who are just complete and utter pricks. I know this first hand from working in a store where every minute I worked there I had to deal with them.
If it's not them bitching about lenght of the que to pay, it's them bitching about missing out on a partwork magazine, or them not being able to find a magazine/ book when it is litterally sitting right there on the shelf in plain view right beside them.
You only realise how bad we can be when you put up with that shit for several months and begin to loathe the sight of them.

If anybody else here has some horror stories regarding this then hey, Go nuts and post away.

I agree, but, then I work for a living too.

I work in a supermarket and you're right, you really get to see the dregs of society. There are some very nice people who come in everyday and chat with me but then there are some people who seem to forget that slavery was abolished in the late 19th century. I deal with them by being extra nice and they usually leave in a sutibly ashamed state. Back when I first started there one woman was so nasty to me one day I actually cried but I eventually realise she was an ignorant snob and she'd probably never done a day's work in her life.

They worst thing about trying to sell anything is having to put up with the fucking morons who wish to buy it.

Used to work in a designer clothes shop. Some of the people who came in needed a slap or 10.

To quote Basil Fawlty - "They treat you like dirt, you know. Of course, it's pure ignorance".
I work in Marks and Spencer, and although most of the customers are very nice, the majority of them are old, and there is nothing worse than an elderly snob who refuses to accept the fact that the world has moved on and times change. They expect you to fetch and carry for them, bow and scrape, pack their bags, lick their brogues and do everything for them short of breathing. One old cunt sounded like Basil Brush gene-spliced with Terry-Thomas and he really got my goat. To begin with, he'd left his hearing aid at home so I had to SHOUT everything at him at least three times, and to add insult to injury he made a big fucking palaver of returning three shirts he'd bought yesterday. "I got the wrong size because I wasn't wearing my glasses". He was so arrogant and snooty, he almost made me wish Hitler had won that fucking war, just to aggravate oxygen thieves like him.

you wanna try working in a call centre. loan applications, technical support, council enquiries, orderlines...

you name it, i say don't work it

and you're damn right, consumers are assholes

... sorry, forgot to add

and for those of you who already work in a call centre of any kind, here's a tip:

if you get someone very angry at you because you're not telling them what they wanna hear, be very apologetic and offer to let them speak to your superior. then, transfer them to the fax machine. just hope you don't get them when they ring back even more "disgruntled" :D

World Of Weird spouted:
oxygen thieves .

LMAO..... I used to work in a pub and when I got rowdy or rude clientel I used to turn around and squeeze some cock cheese from under my bell end and im there glasses with it...
One Night I got this really snooty cow who was bellowing about how expensive everything was... (I think she was from up't Nort) so I gave her wine spritzer a Cheese rimm. she appologized and said that she liked the flavour of the wine down south...... I nearly wet myself...

MMmmm.. Cheesey

As it is lunchtime, I have just popped out and bought a cheese sandwhich which I wolfed down with a cup of tea.

Feeling satisfied, and with a delicious cheesey taste still lingering in my mouth, I settled down to a bit Dogbombing.

It was then that I read D-vO's 'helmet cheese' post above.

It was startling how quickly the perception of 'delicious cheesey taste' evaporated from my mind, to be replaced so rapidly by that taste you get in you mouth moments before puking.

Nice. :)

While I agree that some customers are arseholes I still thinks its pointless to bang on about it after all some "People" are arseholes so therefore its only natural that some customers in shops will be arseholes.

I have worked in jobs that had a "customer service" element tand had to be polite no matter how much of a fucking arsehole the customer is.

No offense to anyone who works in a shop (I have myself) but a lot of shop assistants these days seem to be retarded which is fine sometimes but if you have a problem or question your fucked.

The other day I was in Dixons and after taking to serveral people I relised I knew more about electronic equipment then anyone in there and I know fuck all. So I had to spend hours on the net doing research on what I wanted to buy.

And in PC world they don't even bother to pretend they are not fuckwits and are quite rude most of the time.

This does'nt help with peoples temper and politeness why should I be fucking polite to someone who is so fucking stupid they can't speak probably and don't even understand the most basic of manners.

when i worked in lidl this uppety old fuck came in one day with his wife. really posh bloke all self righteous and all that.

anyway lidle policy is (and the tills are designed as such) that the cashier will not pack for the customer and the customer is o put all their goods back in the trolley and pack them at the packing benches. not this old fool. he barked at me "arent you going to pack my bags" to which i replied with the store policy and kindly and politely showed him the packing benches. he went nuts! the abuse he gave me was out of this world, whilst he didnt swear he basically called me a pikey and stuff. his wife, obviously used to his shopping tantrums stood there looking mortified. in the end after much sweetness from me explaining the rules and how there was a queue building up behind him because he was being unreasonable and would he like me to call a manager who would tell him exactly the same thing he replied "i never get treated like this in sainsburys". i replied with "WELL WHY DONT YOU FUCK OFF TO SAINSBURYS THEN YOU STUFFY OLD FART".

i got a round of applause from our other customers.

i have to sort '...homelees of the bius at 2:00 AM
funny thing is when they '...pretend to converse with an imaginary boyfriend..." on a cell phone,
shut up b33tch and get off bus...

AnthillMob spouted:
in the end after much sweetness from me explaining the rules and how there was a queue building up behind him because he was being unreasonable and would he like me to call a manager who would tell him exactly the same thing he replied "i never get treated like this in sainsburys". i replied with "WELL WHY DONT YOU FUCK OFF TO SAINSBURYS THEN YOU STUFFY OLD FART".

i got a round of applause from our other customers.

Did you get sacked???!!? I know when I worked in the argos call centre we'd have no end of people saying "If I'd gone to Index they could have delivered within 3 days" I always bit my tongue but one girl told the customer "Well fucking go to Index then" and hung up - 30 minutes later she was escorted off the premises!!Funny though!!
We get them at the bank I work for now, but you just have to smile nicely - be as sickly sweet as possible - they're only there for a few minutes so I just try to take no notice - Just pisses me off when they don't wait for me to ring my "cashier number ... please"buzzer type thing and your still tidying away the £3000 in pennies that the previous customer has paid in when they appear at your window waving their chequebook at you.

Ell spouted:


Did you get sacked???!!?

nope. simple reason was they had no staff as it was (if youve ever worked for the wankers you'll understand) no one wanted to work for them. i even got away with calling the temporary manager all names unedr the sun (big personality clash) because they needed the little staff they had.

lidl are poo and dont let anyone tell you otherwise. not only are you employed as a cashier but also a cleaner and on many occasions they had me in the underground car park gonr 9 at night sweeping whilst mad alex (the local pikey) slept rough. i disturbed him one night under his pile of boxes and he threatened to kill me. nice.

Hah. I have been on all sides of this equation. It's always the same, the customers want to complain about the service, the service people want to complain about the customers, the manages want to complain about the customers and the service people.

In the end, it's all the same crap ;-)

mxg spouted:
... sorry, forgot to add

and for those of you who already work in a call centre of any kind, here's a tip:

if you get someone very angry at you because you're not telling them what they wanna hear, be very apologetic and offer to let them speak to your superior. then, transfer them to the fax machine. just hope you don't get them when they ring back even more "disgruntled" :D

But if you're talking to me, I'vwe already got your name and extension.

Look, it's simple: if you don't like being the whipping-boys for the greed and failure of management and board executives, don't work in a service industry.

Or do what they do and learn how to pass the buck. The secret is to pass it on to someone real, not the made-up call-centre staff member.

Yes, I know that one too.

I have worked behind the counter in various trade and retail outlets and have had to deal with customers who don't know what they are after or talking about. The easiest way is to be polite and friendly and no matter who much they piss you off just keep smiling and be polite. Not only does it piss them off even more but they cant actually complain about the service either if they are the sort of people who phone up and do that sort of thing either.

On the flipside though I find that if i don't get acknowledged by the staff of a store I walk into within 30 seconds to a minute then I get annoyed especially if all they are doing is sitting there talking about the weekend or the mindless show on the telly last night.

All it takes is a simple 'Hello, how are you today. What are you after?/Can I help you? If you need any help just ask.' Most of them don't have any idea about customer service at all. Just because customer services is generally thought of as a low status job doesn't mean that the staff have to be completley ignorant but neither do they have to lick the shit off of a customers arsehole.

A lot of people who work in customer service and retail don't have much choice these days. It's all the job centre has to offer most of the time. Factories are closing down and unskilled jobs such as wiping tables and cleaning are now combined with serving customers. Usually its the management's fault for not training staff properly and letting them learn as they go alone expecting them to pick things up without any explanations.
Also managers don't realise that their staff need on-going training as products, policies and procedures change.

exactly, managment expect you to be amazing at customer service but offer you no training at all in it. I work for John Lewis and thay have this huge thing for customer service but give no training in it at all

gimps

alpha_centauri spouted:
exactly, managment expect you to be amazing at customer service but offer you no training at all in it. I work for John Lewis and thay have this huge thing for customer service but give no training in it at all

gimps

ditto, we just got told at the induction to be nice and patronising, easy enough really

Except that the store's management has their own idea of what is "nice and patronising" but are too lazy to let on what it is.

What really bothers and bores me to death both as a customer and as somebody who has worked in a charity shop is the old dears who come in and justify everything they do and buy being for their children or grandchildren. "It's a nice sunny day so I'm taking my grandson to the park" is something I often hear. It's like they're saying that people have no right to visit parks unless they have a child in tow. A dog on a leash isn't not good enough. The trouble is when out shopping for mundane things you come across the type of people you'd normally cross the road to avoid. This is why I prefer to do as much shopping as I can in the city centre and big supermarkets where it's more anonymous and I don't have to listen to boring conversations.

I’ve mentioned it on here before but I work in a supermarket and on Christmas Eve there was a ridiculous amount of customers. I work on the tills and I was being as quick, pleasant and helpful as possible but it wasn’t good enough for some people! At one point my till froze, and I was in total disbelief when the customer called me a ‘fucking stupid cunt’ –it wasn't my fault! I had called my supervisor to sort the till out and I asked her to serve him because I wasn’t going to put up with that kind of language!
Consumers are assholes!

AnthillMob spouted:
i replied with "WELL WHY DONT YOU FUCK OFF TO SAINSBURYS THEN YOU STUFFY OLD FART".

i got a round of applause from our other customers.

Well done that have must felt soooo good.

Yeah its rich people that are the worst.

Marks and Spencer is a shit company to work for.
The induction goes like this -
Day one - corporate bumph, shite videos, loads of waffle about customer service.
Day two - till training for an hour, then on the shop floor where you are left to your own devices.
Day three - Deep despair sets in due to constantly having to ask questions about your job and feeling permanently useless as a result.
Hilariously, their recruitment slogan this year was "Share the love of it". The love of fuckin' WHAT? Being sneezed and coughed on by trampy old wastes of ozone? Being bollocked by thicko shopgirls who know fuck all about fuck all? Being sneered at by the hierarchy who think you're after their job just because you actually go to work to WORK, not to stand around doing shit all but gossip and pretend to be busy to avoid the (admittedly mostly awful) customers?
Fuck off.

We had this one twat in the other day who wanted to return a fountain pen. I didn't deal with him myself but my mate did and she told me about him the day afterwards. He said the pen didnt work properly and he had a list written on a piece of card with ten reasons why he should have his money back (I kid you not). Basically there was nothing wrong with the pen and he just wasn't using it right, when my mate got it to work fine he said she had just been lucky and winged at her some more. They gave him his money back in the end becuase of this bullshit 'goodwill' policy that they have.

but what a tossmonkey that man was.....

anyone else have any more tales to share?

I prefer it when shop assistants show me how to use products properly rather than replace them without questions asked. I bought a CD once which kept jumping. Took it back to the supermarket where it was replaced. The replaced CD did the same. I took that back to the supermarket where an assistant kindly pointed out the smudge on the CD and that I could keep it clean with a cloth or CD wipes.

Yuck, customers. External or internal, they're both just as frustrating. Luckily I mainly deal with internal customers (other staff, I'm IT support) so don't usually have to put up with the rudeness, but everything else goes...

Everthing has to be NOW. Not 2 minutes later, not 2 seconds later... now. It doesn't matter if you have 10 other people with life-or-death tasks to be done - everyone feels their little problem is the most important in the world and everything else should be dropped.

No matter how simple the task, it's up to you to do it. This is especially bad in IT support - I've literally been called across offices to reload paper in a printer... changing inkjet cartridges is a very common request.

Cloudane spouted:

No matter how simple the task, it's up to you to do it. This is especially bad in IT support - I've literally been called across offices to reload paper in a printer... changing inkjet cartridges is a very common request.

Those people needed to be shown how to do those things and not just the office junior because he or she could be off sick or having a holiday.

I have to say 'hello' and 'goodbye' to customers so yesterday I said 'hello' to this old man at my till and I was shocked to hear him say 'who the hell are you?' I was too shocked to say anything back! I couldn't even read out the price total!

You should have shown him the door. Rudeness like this shouldn't be tolerated. It's like damned if you do, damned if you don't. If you don't say "hello" you're in trouble with the management, if you do then you get awkward customers who have no business to be there.

You should have shown him the door. There's no excuse for rudeness like this.

Let me make you feel a lickle bit better...hear mi now sing along with me, when I say rice you say an' pea...

RICE!!!

lemsip spouted:


Those people needed to be shown how to do those things and not just the office junior because he or she could be off sick or having a holiday.

Sad thing is, I do try to teach them. Most do listen and get it, but there are a couple who just don't want to know and will consistently argue "but you're IT!! It's YOUR job!!"

As a charitable training organisation, the nearest 'my lot' have to office juniors are volunteers and trainees. Both tend to come and go like a common cold.

But anyway I inadvertently ended up OT. I also get to deal with 'external' customers buying furniture when our furniture refurb shop (another part of the organisation) ends up understaffed. Pretty often. Price makes no difference... our lot have refurbished items at prices much more sane than brand new. Yet still... customers whinge about what's available at the time.. the layout... the table they bought for £5 that doesn't fit in their room.. everything.

Rather you than me!

Cloudane spouted:


No matter how simple the task, it's up to you to do it. This is especially bad in IT support - I've literally been called across offices to reload paper in a printer... changing inkjet cartridges is a very common request.

Yeah I used work in support everyone thought their problem was more important than everyone elses it was crap and I hated it.

I work part time in a clothes shop, and some of the bastards you get in are unreal...

Particularly the one who, while I was bending down picking something up, dropped a garment on my head- and left it there...

Or the person who stole a pair of our pants, put them on in the fitting room and left their old pants (complete with skiddies) lying hidden in a corner.

I hate the general fucking public.

You and me both!
Whilst I was employed at Nazi and Spencer, some fat bastard reeked out our changing room sooo much we had to close it for half an hour.

Some chubby chick was so minging that we had to bin the clothes she tried on, and tell her she wasn't allowed to try on anything else... smelly cow.

I'd ban any cunt who even LOOKS pikey from ALL shops.
Let the cunts wear sacks and paper bags, it's not like they're useful members of society, is it?

World Of Weird spouted:
I'd ban any cunt who even LOOKS pikey from ALL shops.
Let the cunts wear sacks and paper bags, it's not like they're useful members of society, is it?

I agree!!!! If you can't be arsed to get a job, don't fucking bother me while I'm doing mine!!!! Get it from the catalogues like the rest of your pikey mates!!!!

My mum used to buy clothes from catalogues, and what did all these garments have in common?
They were all shit.

I remember when I was about 17 she got me some 'comedy' boxer shorts from a catalogue, adorned with cartoon pictures of nude women. Nice. Imagine stripping down to those things during a heated moment. Guaranteed to kill the mood stone dead!

Why do catalogues always have random z list celebs 'modelling' in them?

I'd probably buy something that had been modelled by, say, Derek Griffiths off Play School or Robin Askwith, just to make a statement.

Have you forgotton that these people purchasing stuff from your shop goes toward keeping you paid?

Kinky McFoxxy spouted:

Or the person who stole a pair of our pants, put them on in the fitting room and left their old pants (complete with skiddies) lying hidden in a corner.

No!! Thats horrible!

salsa spouted:
Have you forgotton that these people purchasing stuff from your shop goes toward keeping you paid?

This is very true. I try and tell myself this whilst I am sitting at work and theres a constant stream of customers glaring at me because I'm not working quick enough to get the queue down (I work in a very busy bank) - but it doesn't always make me feel more tolerant of them.

I work in a customer facing industry, and it is hard, but its important. End of the day they are happy, they come back, they tell your friends, your wages are higher, your happier, your nicer to them etc etc.

salsa spouted:
Have you forgotton that these people purchasing stuff from your shop goes toward keeping you paid?

No, and I also remembered that pikey scum stealing from us results in a cut in all the staff's hours, and consequently a cut in pay... and that I am a shop ASSISTANT, not a servant. I don't get paid £4.60 an hour to clean up shitty pants.

Kinky McFoxxy spouted:


I agree!!!! If you can't be arsed to get a job, don't fucking bother me while I'm doing mine!!!! Get it from the catalogues like the rest of your pikey mates!!!!

I agree your not a servant. I agree your not someones dogsbody. But it is your choice of job.

salsa spouted:


I agree your not a servant. I agree your not someones dogsbody. But it is your choice of job.

Nooooo, it isn't. I'm working part time to fund my studies, and it's either this or have people be rude to me in a call centre or restaurant. This way I get 25% off clothes. People treat shop assistants like crap, and it's the 'well, it's your job' attitude that makes it worse.

Put it this way, if I treated customers with the same level of contempt that they treated me, I wouldn't be in a job.

You still choose to do it, if it is to fund your studys or not.

Everyone gets treated like crap in their job by someone, be it an internal or external customer.

BTW, I didnt post what I did purely to have a go at you.

Well, I either do it or sponge off the state, so I do it. I'd rather be in the position I'm in, with my own place and some income, than not knowing the value of money... and I have to say, I'm a model customer! (even to those kitchen salespeople who phone at dinner time!). I'd just like to see some of the courtesy I extend to others being extended to me.

I didn't think you were having a go at me...

Ell spouted:


No!! Thats horrible!

Oh... and someone pissed in the fitting room once... it was a right fishy smelling one too.

And the worst customers to deal with at the till are...
The ones who stink (and they're usually the ones who pay by cheque for something costing £4.32, so they're there for AGES causing you to gag and retch)
The ones who ask fucking stupid questions ("Where's the food hall?" Read the signs as you come in, you twunt)
The ones with screaming incontinent brats who they plonk on the counter and proceed to poo and screech loudly
The ones who want to exchange about thirteen items and you have to piss about doing refunds for donkey's years

By the way, if anyone out there is considering a job at HMV, don't even THINK about it. I did it a few years back and the fucking place is Pikeyville.

I'm not awfully fond of shop assisants.

But good heavens, Kinky's cute n'est pas? I wouldn't give her any grief if I was in her shop.

*blush*

World Of Weird spouted:
The ones who ask fucking stupid questions ("Where's the food hall?" Read the signs as you come in, you twunt)

Erm, what about the people who cannot see?

Its so easy to criticise everyone while sitting on your high horse. Unfortunately life isnt all cut and dried, just give people a bit of a break.

salsa spouted:


Erm, what about the people who cannot see?

Its so easy to criticise everyone while sitting on your high horse. Unfortunately life isnt all cut and dried, just give people a bit of a break.

To be fair, I think he's referring to the stupid people, not blind or visually impaired folk.


You'll find that the worst customers are able-bodied with pikey tendencies. Those with impaired movement, vision or hearing tend to be more considerate because they're more aware of themselves and the people around them through necessity.

point is how do you tell the difference. My nan is virtually blind and still goes out and does her shopping on her own. Now to look at her you wouldnt know there was anything wrong with her.

If anyone treated her in that was I would be seriously unhappy.

I dunno, if we could all be a tiny bit kinder about other people, then hopefully the world would be a better and happier place.

salsa spouted:
point is how do you tell the difference. My nan is virtually blind and still goes out and does her shopping on her own. Now to look at her you wouldnt know there was anything wrong with her.

If anyone treated her in that was I would be seriously unhappy.

I dunno, if we could all be a tiny bit kinder about other people, then hopefully the world would be a better and happier place.

See, that's the thing, you can bust your ass at customer service (the area manager of our shop ADORES me because I'm so nice to customers) but the slightest thing will still result in a complaint. :(

You'll always get people who spit in your soup and piss in your fitting rooms... and it's just WRONG.

I work in a complaints department, so I completely understand that. I would never complain now untless I had a valid reason to.

But, if I get shoddy disrespectful service I do kick ass.

salsa spouted:
I work in a complaints department, so I completely understand that. I would never complain now untless I had a valid reason to.

But, if I get shoddy disrespectful service I do kick ass.

I would NEVER complain in a restaurant, after seeing Restaurants form Hell... put it this way, I only swallow for Mr McFoxxy...

Nothing can seem to change the fact that the General Public, on the whole, are pigs. Yes it's your job to be nice to them, and hats off to those who do it because I certainly can't stand it for very long. But it's understandable that behind that smiling, tolerant face is someone who's sick to death of Joe Public!

I saw a post not long ago about plans to fit wireless Internet access to the first class section of certain trainsin the US...

Someone said why do that, why not just have physical network sockets?

The answer that came from one of them sums up what I think here.

(paraphrased): "You obviously haven't worked on any projects that deal with the public. If you had, you'd know that in minutes that socket would be plugged with chewing gum. I'm sad to say it, but frankly humans can be complete pigs."

The whole of Northampton's Abington Street (the 'High Street') had to be cleaned by specialists - at GREAT cost to the taxpayer - due to filthy fucking pikeys lobbing their gum on the pavement. It looked like a flock of incontenent pigeons had bombed it relentlessly for a week.

You know, I'm customer facing and the saying behaviour breeds behaviour is so true.
Treat people with respect, work efficiently and know your product 99% people can be turned around and leave happy.
Trouble is sometimes staff are just shit, the public can tell and get fustrated, like when you are waiting to pay and the assistants are chatting. I would drop the goods and walk out if thats how I was treated. Seems that most of the retail assistants nowadays think they are above the job when in reality they can't even do that right.
Some people have an agenda that can never ever be satisfied, true fucking idiots. Lets not tar everyone with the same brush.

That's true... there are two sides to evertying. There are two newsagents near where I work... I used to go to 'A'.

Well 'A' is run by 2 members of staff, and they both stand there talking to each other while you're patiently waiting to pay for something. Eventually one of them semi-regards you, says the price, holds her hand out and turns her head back to her colleague to continue the conversation. I don't expect a hi and bye necessarily (though it'd be nice) but completely disregarding the customer (except to take money) is pretty ignorant IMO.

Then one day I went into newsagent B. Bigger place, one member of staff (on a rota with a few others). The staffmember was coping fine, cheerful and made conversation - just the right length to run from walking in, grabbing the items, paying and leaving.

Guess which one I regularly go to :)